I have been married for 10 years. Ours was a love marriage. We had our share of ups and down, more so because his mother still does not like me. I was always considered to be an outsider in the family. My husband took his mother’s side on almost all occasions. When he understood the situation later, he said he couldn’t do much and asked me to bear with it. We have hardly had a sex life because of this. I was still madly in love with him though, so I agreed to everything he said. He tried to compensate by taking me for trips, buying gifts, etc., but the core issues were never solved. Now, after 10 years, he wants a divorce, saying his mother is more important and he cannot see her unhappy! It sounds ridiculous! He says there is no other woman in his life. I do not know what suddenly went wrong, since we did not have any major fights. I feel his mother and brother are influencing him and I am not sure what to do. I feel there is no reason for such a drastic decision, since I have already consoled myself that his mother will remain the same. What do you suggest I do? — Nikita
It sounds as if you have been unhappy for much of the 10 years that you have been married to this man. You need to ask yourself if it was worth the time, effort and sacrifice to end up with someone who didn’t ever give you the importance that was rightfully yours. You are entitled to certain rights as his lawful spouse. If your husband still believes his mother’s happiness is more important that his wife’s happiness, for whatever deluded reason he connects the two, ask yourself if you want to spend your life with someone like him. If you still do, have an open, honest conversation with him and his mother, and ask him to consider marriage counselling with you.
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